Division of the human family into 2 distinct political groups began some12,000 years ago. Humans existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunter/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains in the summer &
would go to the beach & live on fish & lobster in winter.
The 2 most important events in all of history were the invention of beer & the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization & together were
the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into 2 distinct subgroups:
Liberals & Conservatives.
Once beer was discovered it required grain & that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our ancestors were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.
Some men spent their days tracking & killing animals to B-B-Q at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as "the conservative movement."
Other men who were weaker & less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly B-B-Q's & doing the sewing, fetching & grooming. This was the beginning of the Liberal
Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats,
the invention of group therapy & group hugs & the concept of Democratic
voting to decide how to divide the meat & beer that conservatives provided.
Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by
Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer
white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, & French food are standard liberal fare.
Another interesting revolutionary side note: most of their women have
higher testosterone levels than their men.
Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in
Hollywood & group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the
designated hitter rule because it wasn't "fair" to make the pitcher also
Conservatives drink domestic beer. They eat red meat & still provide for
their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo cowboys,
lumberjacks, construction workers, medical doctors, police officers,
corporate executives, soldiers, athletes & generally anyone who works productively outside government. Conservatives who own companies hire
other conservatives who want to work for a living.
Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to "govern" the producers
& decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are
more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals
remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America. They crept
in after the Wild West was tame & created a business of trying to get MORE for nothing.
Just wanted to remind you all that your votes for W do not matter here in the liberal home state of John Kerry. But to see who wins the bigger picture will be interesting. No matter who wins no one can say that the best man won.
WRITE IN NADER 04
I think that casting a vote in Mass for George W wont get him to carry the state, but it will lessen Kerrys margin of winning the state. I pray to god the rest of the country will be able to see Kerry as the liberal tax raising senator he is and keep him out of the white house. I just hope I dont wake up tommorow and hear three horrible words"
Ok, it's almost 5am and there still is no "official" winner, even though we know that The President will be re-elected. Seeing as I work 2300-0700 and have had the opportunity to listen to alot of the developments, here are some random observations:
- President Bush is going to win the popular vote by almost 3.7 million. In 2000 when Gore won the popular vote, he only won by 500,000 or so. The Democrats made a big stink back then about him being the popular choice and not paying any mind to the electoral college. I don't think the Democrats will be using the popular vote argument this time around.
- The democrats made a big point of focusing on how they registered so many new voters that, in their view, would push Kerry past Bush and not have a repeat of 2000. The new voters voted alright, they just voted for Bush. The Dems weren't expecting that.
- Over 10,000 people huddled in Copley Square for a "Victory Celebration" for Sen. Kerry for over 12 hours. It was cold, raw and raining a good portion of the night. Do you think Kerry would at least make an appearance? Nope. He sent out pretty boy Edwards to say the fight isn't over. (yeah right) The majority of those that got soaked and probably got pneumonia were the grass roots people that worked so hard for Kerry for so long. They helped register voters, worked the phones, donated money, held signs, all for no money. The egotistical bastard couldn't even show up and say Thanks?
- Man, the democrats are sore losers. To this day, they claim Bush stole the election in 2000 and he was "selected not elected" by the courts. Wait a sec, who initiated the lawsuits? Oh yeah, The democrats. They started out in the local courts in Florida. They got shot down. They moved up to the appeals courts in Florida, Sorry. They went to the Florida State Supreme Court, no chance. Ok, let's try the federal district courts!!! Florida district? Eh-Eh! One of these will pan out eventually. The Federal Circuit Court of Appeals? Sorry, try again. As we all know, the US Supreme Court finally heard the case and lo and behold, they came to the same decision as all of the other courts, Bush won. So, now they want to wait and see how Ohio turns out. Jeez! Show a little class and dignity as well as respect for the Office of the Presidency and do the honorable thing, concede.
- Finally, how many lawsuits are going to be filed in about 4 hours by Democratic lawyers who claim voter fraud and disenfranchisement (not sure if that's even a word?) etc. Give it up, you lost!
Advice for the democrats, start working on your Hilary Clinton signs for 2008.