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Every year the FBI, is asked to investigate over 36,000 Serious Crimes
including Suspicious Deaths and Homicides. Every year the Homicide
Investigations Unit puts out its Top 12 Homicides of the year.


1- Alex Mijtus,36 years old, is killed by his wife, armed with a 20
inch long vibrator. Mrs Mijtus had enough of her husband's strange sex
practices and one night during a prolonged session of fun she snapped,
pushing all 20 inches of the vibrator into Alex's anus until it
ruptured several internal organs and caused severe bleeding.

2- Debby Mills-Newbroughton, 99 years old, was killed as she crossed
the road. She was to turn 100 the next day, but crossing the road with
her daughter to go to her own birthday party her wheel chair was hit
by the truck delivering her birthday cake.

3- Peter Stone, 42 years old, is murdered by his 8 year old daughter,
who he had just sent to her room with no dinner. Young Samantha Stone
felt that if she couldn't have dinner no one should, and she promptly
inserted 72 rat poison tablets into her fathers coffee as he prepared
dinner. The victim took one sip and promptly collapsed. Samantha Stone
was given a suspended sentence as the judge felt she didn't realise
what she was doing, until she tried to poison her mother using the
same method one month later.

4- David Danil, 17 years old, was killed by his girl friend after The
attempted to have his way with her. His unwelcome advance was met with
a double-barreled shotgun. Charla's (the girlfriends) father had given
it to her an hour before the date started, just in case.

5- Javier Halos, 27 years old, was killed by his landlord for failing
to pay his rent for 8 years. The landlord, Kirk Weston, clubbed the
victim to death with a toilet seat after he realized just how long it
had been since Mr Halos paid his rent.

6- Megan Fry, 44 years old, is killed by 14 state troopers after she
wandered onto a live firing, fake town, simulation. Seeing all the
troopers walking slowly down the street Megan Fry had jumped out in
front of them and yelled Boo!. The troopers, thinking she was a pop up
target, fired 67 shots between them, over 40 of them hitting the
target. She just looked like a very real looking target, one of the
troopers stated in his report.

7- Julia Smeeth, 20 years old, was killed by her brother Michael
because she talked on the phone too long, Michael clubbed his sister
to death with a cordless phone, then stabbed her several times with
the broken aerial.

8- Helena Simms, Wife to the famous American nuclear scientist Harold
Simms was killed by her husband after she had an affair with the
neighbor. Over a period of 3 months Harold substituted Helena's eye
shadow with a Uranium composite that was highly radioactive, until she
died of radiation poisoning. Although she suffered many symptoms,
including total hair loss, welts, blindness, extreme nausea and even
had an ear lobe drop off, the victim never attended a doctor's surgery
or hospital for a check up.

9- Conrad Middleton, 26 years old, was killed by his twin brother
Brian after a disagreement over who should take the family home after
their parents passed away. Conrad had a nasal problem, and had no
sense of smell. After the argument Brian stormed out of the house,then
snuck back later, and turned on the 3 gas taps in the house, filling
it with gas. He then left out a box of cigars, a lighter and a note
saying, Sorry for the spree, have a puff on me, Brian. Conrad promptly
lit a cigar, destroying the house, and himself in the process.

10- Patty Winter, 35 years old, was killed by her neighbor in the
early hours of a Sunday morning. Her neighbor, Falt Hame, for years
had a mounted F6 phantom jet engine in his rear yard. He would fire
the jet engine, aimed at an empty block at the back of his property.
Patty Winter would constantly complain to the local sheriff's officers
about the noise and the potential risk of fire. Mr Hame was served
with a notice to remove the engine immediately. Not liking this he
invited Miss Winter over for a cup of coffee and a chat about the
whole situation. What Winter didn't know was that he had changed the
position of the engine, as she walked into the yard he activated it,
hitting her with a blast of 5,000 degrees, killing her instantly, and
forever burning her outline into the driveway.

11- Michael Lewis, angry at his gay boyfriend, used the movie, Die
Hard With a Vengeance as inspiration. He drugged his boyfriend, Tony
Berry, into an almost catatonic state, then dressed him only in a
double sided white board that read Death to all N**g**s! on one side,
and God Loves the KKK. On the other. Lewis then drove the victim to
downtown Harlem and dropped him off. Two minutes later Berry was
deceased.

12- Military Sergeant John Joe Winter killed his two timing wife by
loading her car with Trintynitrate explosive (similar to C4). The Ford
Taurus she was driving was filled with 750 kgs of explosive, forming a
force twice as powerful as the Oklahoma Bombing. The explosion was
heard by several persons some up to 14 kilometers away. No trace of
the car or the victim were ever found, only a 55 meter deep crater,
and 500m of missing road.

8-O lol
 

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Holy Crap! Though those were down right wrong, one can't help but smirk just alittle bit if not even laugh :)
 
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