Funny thing your kids say. | Page 3 | MassCops

Funny thing your kids say.

Discussion in 'Just Shootin' The Breeze' started by 263FPD, Sep 17, 2010.

  1. SOT

    SOT Thread Killa

    The idiot that came up with the names Percy and Chuck for trains should be beaten with a stick.

    In church on Sunday, Cruz went up to the front for the children's reading, and he left his two little trains back in the pew.
    Two-thirds of the way down the aisle it dawns on him and starts walking back to the pew yelling at the top of his lungs,
    "I want my cock and pussy, I want my COCK AND PUSSY, I WANT MY COCK AND PUSSY!!!!"

    Now I know he is saying, or trying to say, Chuck and Percy....but no one else in the church does.

    Thank god they don't have trains named, Clint, Virginia, Ash, or Krunt
     
  2. Rock

    Rock Undefined

    At Disney a few years ago. We're in the room all trying to decide which park to hit for the day. The 5 year old is getting mad because he thinks he's being ignored. I finally look at him and ask him where he wants to go. He says in a stern abrupt tone, "It rhymes with SHMANIMAL KINGDOM!"

    We went to 'Shmanimal Kingdom'.
     
  3. Stark1848

    Stark1848 Guest

    My friend was outside today putting bird seed in her feeders... Her daughter asked a question about woodpeckers. My friend said, "do you like woodpeckers, honey?", and her daughter says, "Mommy, I LOVE peckers!"
     
  4. LGriffin

    LGriffin Always Watching

    We took the kids sliding on the mountain yesterday. After pulling the baby up a few times, we decided to let her walk up since she was full of energy. Half way up she said that she felt like her legs were going to throw up.
     
  5. DEI8

    DEI8 Supporting Member

    This is from a 3 YO, in voice full of panic. Daddy daddy I gotta poop, daddy I gotta poop, gotta poop. Then there was a long pause and the voice changed from panic to crying, I pooped my pants.

    Quickly I said its not your fault, but you need to go see Mumma, as I called my dog and fled out the back door.
     
  6. screamineagle

    screamineagle Masscops Therapist

    The one black kid at my sons school told him " your unusually tall" to which my son replied " your unusually dark".
     
  7. justanotherparatrooper

    justanotherparatrooper Pissin' in liberals cheerio's for 40 years :) Staff Member

    Same son, now 25 telling my shepard yesterday "you even look at my food and I'll go Vietnamese on you":unsure:
     
  8. daveh

    daveh Still [] Square

    "You mean you did not even CONSIDER my wishes when YOU GUYS decided to have another child?" - 14 year old only son
     
  9. DEI8

    DEI8 Supporting Member

    From my three year old daughter to my six year old, "give me the phone my boyfriend is gonna call me":stomp:
     
  10. 263FPD

    263FPD Well-Known Member

    How's you onion?:redcarded:
     
  11. LGriffin

    LGriffin Always Watching

  12. Oscar8

    Oscar8 MassCops Member

    My neighbors wife is very well endowed. My two year old son walks up to her one day and says "I like your breast". We all thought he said I like your dress. We asked him, you like her dress? He says NO "I like her breast" HAHA THATS MY BOY!:shades_smile:
     
  13. I scolded my 3yo son for poking his little sister in the eye. He replied "Well I was trying to poke her on the nose, but I keep missing!" :)
     
  14. TacEntry

    TacEntry MassCops Member

    My daughter a couple years a go at pre-school, when asked what "Mommy and Daddy do":

    "My Daddy shoots people in the head for the salute flag"

    Needless to say Mrs. Tac was horrified. Her teacher loved it, and had a very good sense of humor about it...
     
  15. Just heard my almost 23 mo. old daughter tell my 3 yr old son "Are you in charge? No."

    Couldn't help but laugh. :)
     
  16. 7costanza

    7costanza Supporting Member

    My sister asked me a few weeks ago to teach her 14 yr old son the basics of firearms. So I went over to her house, went over all the safety stuff, then went outside and used his bb gun to go over the basics of shooting. So we are talking and my other nephew who is about 4 comes out and stands there listening, he says " Uncle Sean do you shoot people " so of course I said " only bad people" . He went back in and the lesson continued for a while. When we went back in later the little nephew had a friend over, as I walked in he looks at his friend and says " Thats my uncle Sean, be good or he will shoot you ".
     
  17. HistoryHound

    HistoryHound Supporting Member

    That reminds me of an argument my kids had when they were younger. I can't remember what started it but the oldest looked at her sister and said, "you have two hands" to which her sister replied "yeah, but I only have one mother." I have to admit it's hard to break up an argument when you're trying not to laugh.
     
  18. 5-0

    5-0 Guest

    So, I've got 3 hummingbird feeders up, and the birds are coming non-stop now... groups of 2-3. My 2 youngest (5 and 2) stand at the windows now going :
    'hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm' all day because they think they are calling the birds. Kill me.
     
  19. Driving down the road, my 3yo son in the backseat sees a MSP cruiser w/ his lights on pass us going the other way. He says "Hey mommy, that's one of daddy's friends from his work!" I say "Yeah, and he's going somewhere in a hurry." He replies "Probably to get coffee." :)
     
  20. csauce777

    csauce777 Supporting Member

    The funny part is he was right :p
     
  21. 263FPD

    263FPD Well-Known Member

    I posted this on my FB, but of course not all of you had seen it.

    My three year old daughter to my one year old son as they play with my daughter's toy kitchen utensils, "Put down the knife and put your hands behind your back!!!"
    I almost fell out of my chair.
     
  22. topcop14

    topcop14 Subscribing Member

    Watched my 4 and 5 year olds act out a felony stop one day. It was word for word what they saw on cops . I almost pissed myself as the 5 year old yelled stop resisting as he put his toy handcuffs on his little brother.
     
  23. 5-0

    5-0 Guest

    Anytime I show my kids some funny YT video, they walk around repeating random quotes with me. It's hilarious. The latest one is this:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bTbAsmPOKo

    N
    ow I hear 'Treat'... 'Mouse'... all day.
     
  24. Delta784

    Delta784 Guest

    When my son was really young, every time I'd leave for work, he'd say "Daddy, farefuls (careful) and I hope you don't have to shoot a bad guy wif your gum (yes, gum)".
     
  25. 5-0

    5-0 Guest

    Along those lines B, my 2 year old was helping me garden, and keep saying "Tiss Tabooz' translated: She wanted to kiss my tattoo, she had never seen it. I chuckled.
     
  26. topcop14

    topcop14 Subscribing Member

    Every day when I get home my boys ask if I caught any bad guys and when I say no the youngest says in.his most serious voice. Oh darn it !!!
     

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