[CJIS]

Burglar Stuck in Museum Air Vent Calls 911 for Help
FOXNews - 1 hour ago
KNOXVILLE, Tenn. - It wasn't the preferred way to enter the Knoxville Museum of Art. When Richard Anthony Smith found himself 40 feet down an air conditioning shaft with no way out, he used his cell phone to call police.
Cops: Burglary suspect calls 911 after getting stuck in museum's ... USA Today
On a special mission from the "US Illuminati" in Knoxville Knoxville News Sentinel

 

[adroitcuffs]

LMAO, this guy is a serious whacker!!

Hoisted up and read his rights, Smith told police he was a "special agent from the United States Illuminati, badge number 0931" and had rappelled onto the museum from a helicopter, a police report said.
He said he was following orders to "defuse and confiscate" a Soviet-made nuclear warhead, specifically a "MERV6SS-22AN" warhead, according to the report. The bomb supposedly was hidden in a blue, plastic cow sculpture in the museum basement, he said.
However, Smith told officers his "agency" called while he was in air-vent limbo to say it made a mistake and the bomb might be in a Memphis museum instead.

Full article: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26762188/?GT1=43001

 

[bleeps]

Yeah, well, we'll all feel stupid when the commies hit the red button and blow that blue plastic cow, and most of Knoxville, sky-high.