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Always Watching
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Discussion Starter #1
A 55 year old dwarf has been jailed after impersonating a Dalek and threatening to exterminate care workers in his sheltered accommodation.


Here he is being 'quite jolly'

Ian Salter-Bromley described as 4ft tall but "quite jolly" was tasered by police not once, but twice, after he stuck a rubber dart to his head, filled his mouth with Dominos and shouted "Exterminate! Exterminate!" at his carers whilst possessing nothing more deadly than a colostomy bag.

To be fair on the police, he had been previously served with an Anti-Social Behaviour Order (ASBO) for exposing himself, smearing poop and pee all over the reception area of his care home, and had also previously threatened to kill a fellow passenger on a bus with a butter knife.

Not a hunting knife or a switchblade or a breadknife or even a sharp knife - no, a butter knife, which is called a butter knife because the only thing it is capable of slicing is butter. And margarine. And soft cheese. You get the point.

He's 4 feet tall when he's upright, wears a colostomy bag and was mostly confined to a wheelchair until that was stolen, since when he has had to support himself with a Zimmer frame. Nevertheless, as angry as Mr. Salter-Bromley may have been, the police felt it was necessary to taser him - to repeat - not once, but twice, instead of maybe just poking a stick through the wheels of his chair, or, being twice as tall, twice as numerous, four times as heavy and with an arm reach twice as long, maybe just pushing him out of the way and handcuffing him. Nope. Tasered. Twice. Brave policemen.

Perhaps it was a mistake to impersonate a Dalek. Maybe if he'd put on his best R2-D2 face and wandered around in circles going "pooply poop poop pee pee peeple peep poop poop", then the taser-wielding imperial stormtroopers would have recognized his restrictions in terms of movement and waited at the top of the stairs until his batteries ran out.

But no. They tasered a 4 foot dwarf suffering from severe depression and confined to a wheelchair, not once, but twice, and put him in prison.

In the famous - but unconfirmed - words of Master Yoda, also widely described an infirm dwarf with anger management issues, "you, fuck".
http://smashinglife.co.uk/55-year-o...&utm_medium=facebook&utm_source=socialnetwork

Worlds gone nuts so this is the type of shit i'll be posting until we get a real leader in officer who doesn't villainize the good guys and praise the bad. Forgive me but it's for your own good. If you get high blood pressure and end up on meds you'll be fucked by obamacare and we can't lose anymore good people. So read the stupid shit, laugh, exercise and eat right so we can get through this mess.
 

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I think, therefore I'll never be promoted.
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18,339 Posts
I read this the other day and didn't comment. I will now. I would never have tased this guy. I'd have simply tipped him over. Tasing him simply got lots of bad press. He may be a jerk (and not even a BIG jerk....aaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahaha) but his actions, though annoying and SOMEWHAT risky, were bullshit. Tip the guy over or like was suggested, shove a stick in his spokes. Why make HIM look like a victim? He's a pain in the ass. We've all dealt with pains in the ass and a pain in the ass is never on the same level as a threat.

Just my opinion.
 

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Super Moderator
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5,852 Posts
Just squeeze his colostomy bag until he backflows shit and gets sepsis, problem solved
 
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