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Discussion in 'Humor' started by Hank Moody, Jan 27, 2012.
"You know, honey, the first they teach us at the academy is to have 365 degrees of awareness. So its like I have a sixth sense for dangers around me!"
"Excuse me miss, I have to kick the living shit out of the douchebag behind me who thinks he's being funny".
He looks a little like my daughter's ex-boyfriend so picturing that is just as funny as hell.
The cop looks like Jorge Posada
Oops, I meant the kid.
Good way to get your ass shot.
Civil Circus test - 75$
New uniform. -100$
4 Hr Bar Detail. -192$
Playing grabass during firearm retention class in the Academy- PRICELESS!!
Famous last words, "Here, hold my beer.".
Excuse me miss, does your idiot boyfriend know what a Glock Sandwich is? Because he's gonna eat whatever he touches
"Hold that thought hun...let me show you what I learned in DT the other day"
With these two fingers, I'm going to fish hook the cuntbucket who thinks he's being smart behind me.
"Well Miss, the thing is, you're cute and all, but I'm going play along so that you don't see those five cops sneaking up behind you and the ten cops sneaking up behind your suzzy little friend back there and...oh, did I say that out loud?"
This officer was to taken by the attention of the young lady, he didn't realize that a kid was putting his gun BACK into the holster after slipping it out, holding up a corner market, two Jewish diamond merchants, a gas station in Queens and a deli in Yonkers. Yeah, the officer was THAT taken with the girl.
The reason this kid might get away with taking the gun, the officer is saying, "See, this is what I picked outta my nose. Have you ever seen one THIS color before?"
Excuse me Miss, does the sound of breaking bones bother you?
"Ya see honey, when you're a New York City Police Officer you have to be on your toes at all times. I'm aware of everything going on within a two block radius and I'm ready to spring at a moments notice. I'm like a cat, wound and ready to pounce at the least little thing and NOTHING escapes me. Like behind you, there's a guy who just littered. I should go and straighten him out, but nah, I like talking to you and I can tell instictively he's not a bad guy and will go back and pick up his trash. So. let's talk about YOU, what do you like about ME?"
Every job has one. The guy with the BIG mouth and ego to match who can't outthink a rubber mouse on a good day.
Jeesh Kil. BORED ? hahaha
Nah, just reliving one night when I was working a detail and.....
hey, none of your business!