A man with a mighty, ten-inch, dandyish moustache has promised a court that he will shave it off, after pleading guilty to assaulting a boy who teased him about it.
Charles Law kicked the 13-year-old after he, and a group of other boys, taunted Law over his facial hair.
'Nice moustache. Where'd you get it?' the boy is said to have asked.
The judge ordered Law to pay £75 to each of the three boys in the group, after hearing Law's pledge to shave the moustache off in the hope of avoiding any further moustache-related violence.
Law said of his moustache: 'It's a shame, but it has to go. I've had it since I was 22. It was up to 16 inches once, but I shaved it down a bit. I will miss it.'
This is not the first time Law has been convicted of a moustache-related crime. He has previous convictions for affray and threatening behaviour that were reportedly linked to his handlebar.
The court was told that Law had a tendency to over-react.
Law also served four years for manslaughter, after stabbing his brother to death
You would think someone who willingly looks like a doofus would be used to, or at least learn to take the cajoles in stride...
I know I have...
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