Last week the East Valley Tribune reported that the Mesa Police Department filed a $100,000 grant with the Department of Defense to add a monkey to its SWAT team. Since then the Mesa police press office has been inundated: Time Magazine, The Washington Post, and Good Morning America have come sniffing around as well as reporters from as far as Australia, Scotland, Idaho, and the Philippines. PETA fired off its trademark invective, though the department has received calls from kind souls offering to donate a monkey. One reality show even wanted to follow the capuchin crime fighter during his heroic SWAT missions, adding a much-needed simian face to the usual human-dominated television fare. But alas, it was not to be. A few facts were off. The original article suggested a Kevlar clad, two-way radio wielding, lock-picking vice vanquisher that according to some follow-up reports was to be deployed to track down corpses of suicide victims. However, this was all purely speculation. Sean Truelove, the officer who reportedly filed the grant, actually only sent a letter of inquiry to the Department of Defense seeking guidance from DARPA as to the cost and practicality of the idea. DARPA, of course, never got back to him; currently the organization is busy engineering an army of invisible, flying, fire-resistant supercapuchins capable of dispersing crowds of insurgents from 7,000 yards with non-lethal payloads while functioning without sleep.
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The Massachusetts Law Enforcement Network opened in 1998 and is now a part of the New England Police Network The site is a pro-police discussion forum intended for sworn police officers and civilian law enforcement officials as well as those interested in pursuing a career in law enforcement here in Massachusetts.
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But alas, it was not to be. A few facts were off. The original article suggested a Kevlar clad, two-way radio wielding, lock-picking vice vanquisher that according to some follow-up reports was to be deployed to track down corpses of suicide victims. However, this was all purely speculation. Sean Truelove, the officer who reportedly filed the grant, actually only sent a letter of inquiry to the Department of Defense seeking guidance from DARPA as to the cost and practicality of the idea. DARPA, of course, never got back to him; currently the organization is busy engineering an army of invisible, flying, fire-resistant supercapuchins capable of dispersing crowds of insurgents from 7,000 yards with non-lethal payloads while functioning without sleep. 
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