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Posted by: Unregistered

I'll preface this post with the disclaimer that this is a very, very strange request.

That said, I am currently in the application process for a Guinness World Record. The record is the Longest Nipple Hair. The current record holder is named Tyler Ing, and you can read about him here: http://wusatv9.com/news/news_article.aspx?storyid=43763 or on several other sites by googling his name. As a frame of reference his record is 3.5 inches, and i estimate my hair is at least 5 inches long.

Anyway, as the last step of the application process Guinness requires 2 signed testimonials from witnesses with "good standing in the community". One of the suggestions they make are Police Officers, so I thought I would pose this question to Boston's finest.

Now I know you guys are all probably very busy and have more important things to do than watch someone measure a really long nipple hair, BUT, if anyone's is curious or has some free time, and has any interest in being one of my witnesses please let me know. The time and place of the measurement are flexible (I'd be willing to come down to a station in the Boston area, and I live in the Back Bay).

You can reach me at czue13@yahoo.com, or i'll check back here in a day or two to see if there was any interest.

thanks,
Cory

ps. I tried to post this a while ago but haven't seen it. Hopefully it doesn't show up twice.

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Posted by: Wolfman

Mark Polishuk/Gazette THE NIPPLE RIPPLE EFFECT. News editor Ravi Amarnath (left) compares his nipular strand to that of Guinness record holder Tyler Ing. Ladies, start your drooling.

Western’s nipple-hair king

By: Ravi Amarnath

Throughout its history, Western has been known for producing students who aim to go above and beyond the standard set by their counterparts in society.

Tyler Ing, a third-year civil engineering student, carried on this proud tradition last November, when after years of grit and determination, his name graced the distinguished pages of the Guinness Book of Records.

Measuring in at 8.89 centimetres, Ing set the record for having the longest nipple hair of any known person on the planet, with the strand protruding from his right nipple. He claimed not to have interfered with it from the time of his birth.

“Growing up I used to get teased like nobody’s business in places like hockey dressing rooms. Lots of girls have tried to pull it out, too,” Ing said.

The verbal harassment Ing faced while growing up only enhanced his desire to continue growing his strand of hair, until his girlfriend finally prompted him last year to apply for the achievement.

“I sent them an intent to register for a record. After it was known that I got the record, they sent me a bunch of forms to fill out and procedures to follow,” Ing said.

While Ing set the record last November, his nipple hair was officially recognized in the latest copy of the Guinness Book of Records, which was published last month.

Since setting the benchmark for nipple hair length, Ing has not received any monetary rewards for his accomplishment, but has noticed a rise in his exposure across the community.

“The record seems to have travelled well through word of mouth,” he said. Among other networks, Ing has been interviewed on CFRB radio and Global Television Network.

While some may find Ing’s current record remarkable, he had a previous nipple hair over two and a half centimetres longer on the other side of his chest. Unfortunately, it fell off before he had a chance to submit it for a record.

Here at The Gazette, a particular news editor believed that he too could achieve greatness. Upon hearing of Ing’s feat, he decided to take it upon himself to challenge the record on the spot.

Alas, records were not meant to be broken yesterday, as Ing’s right nipple hair did appear to be longer by a few millimetres. However, Ing encouraged the disappointed news editor to never give up on his dreams of glory.

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Posted by: SOT

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unregistered ps. I tried to post this a while ago but haven't seen it. Hopefully it doesn't show up twice.

That was the anti-asshat filter kicking in...you must have broke it because the post is here.

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Posted by: Wolfman

Sounds like a job for the Lufkin Tufboy...

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Posted by: KozmoKramer

I've moved this to the "Shootin' the Breeze" forum only because Gil hasnt set up the "Totally Worthless Bullshit" thread yet...
But, good luck with all that; nipple hair boy.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unregistered I'll preface this post with the disclaimer that this is a very, very strange request.

No disclaimer neccessary, but thanks for offering it...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unregistered ps. I tried to post this a while ago but haven't seen it. Hopefully it doesn't show up twice..

We hope too.

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Posted by: CJIS

What the duece???

This is perhaps one of the most bizzare threads I have seen on this site for a long time. I am at a loss of words on this one.

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Posted by: badgebunny

Are u f****** kidding? Dude you seriously need to get a life!!!

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Posted by: Cinderella

ROFLMFAO @ longest hair nipple

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Posted by: SPINMASS

mmmm....yea all set. Next thread please

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Posted by: no$.10

http://scissors.razor-scissors.com/razor/razor.htm

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Posted by: lokiluvr

My delete button is not working,,,,, this crap is still here.

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Posted by: Officer Dunngeon

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cinderella ROFLMFAO @ longest hair nipple

@ longest nipple hair!!!!

I'd be much more impressed with like the world's longest ass hair though...

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Posted by: KozmoKramer

Quote:

Originally Posted by Officer Dunngeon @ longest nipple hair!!!! I'd be much more impressed with like the world's longest ass hair though...

Why didnt you say so Duns?????

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Posted by: USMCMP5811

Quote:

Originally Posted by Officer Dunngeon @ longest nipple hair!!!! I'd be much more impressed with like the world's longest ass hair though...

Come on now Dunny, You know you got this guy beat for longest nipple hair. Maybe ass hair too?

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Posted by: Officer Dunngeon

Quote:

Originally Posted by USMCMP5811 Come on now Dunny, You know you got this guy beat for longest nipple hair. Maybe ass hair too?

Not for longest ass hair, but for longest Kenny-ass-kicking!

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Posted by: USMCMP5811

Quote:

Originally Posted by Officer Dunngeon Not for longest ass hair, but for longest Kenny-ass-kicking!

Who loves ya Dunny?

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Posted by: SOT

I think I may have the world's thickest ass hair...it's like a damn tree trunk...

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Posted by: Cinderella

lmao!!

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Posted by: CJIS

Quote:

Originally Posted by SOT_II I think I may have the world's thickest ass hair...it's like a damn tree trunk...

TIMBER!!

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Posted by: KozmoKramer

Bullshit.
I have dread locks from my ass hair. I defy anyone to challenge my follicle protuberances...

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